Hoda on Tech shootings: 'My heart aches'

Posted: Wednesday, April 16, 2008 3:16 PM by Danielle Brennan

From Hoda Kotb, TODAY host

It still hurts. A year has passed and it still hurts. I keep paging through the newspapers and reading bits and pieces, stories of survivors a year later. My heart aches. I am a 1986 Virginia Tech graduate. It may have been 22 years since I graduated, but I feel so close to that campus. It’s my school.

I will never forget one year ago, those images, those frantic kids running across my campus, through my drill field, becoming my memories. I searched for people I knew — some teachers, Tri-Delta sorority sisters. I realized that even though I didn’t personally know the people who were killed, I did know them. They were brothers and sisters, sons and daughters, they wore maroon and orange and cheered for the Hokies. They were family.

Everyone said this experience would define that campus, but I don’t think so. I really don’t. I think people are defined by what they do after a tragedy, and the wonderful people of Virginia Tech rose up.

They held hands, helped each other, and they are getting stronger every day. I’ll be honest with you: I am sitting in my apartment right now, working on the commencement speech for Virginia Tech. They deserve so much. I hope I am worthy of this honor.

The students of Virginia Tech have overcome so much. They are scarred, but they don’t want you to give them “the look.” You know the one. When you ask them where they go to school and they proudly say “Virginia Tech.” You give them the look of pity. We are strong. We are Virginia Tech.

Click here to watch the video of Hoda's recollection.

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Comments

Thanks for sharing Hoda. I too am a proud Hokie! We will prevail!

Chrissie Schaeffer, Richmond, Virginia (Sent Wednesday, April 16, 2008 6:04 PM)

THANK YOU HODA. I am a '92 VT grad, and was so touched by the words you wrote/spoke last year. Your feelings are exactly how I feel. Living in Michigan, I get "the look" myself and wished I didn't. Thank you.

Holly, Saginaw, MI (Sent Wednesday, April 16, 2008 6:14 PM)

You are worthy Hoda and Va Tech students are too. Your passion and love for the university shines so bright that you will bring radiance and love to your audience. This commencement must be given by a Va Tech grad to Va Tech students...this gesture to you is fitting as you will do everyone and yourself proud. Stand tall and speak from the heart, I wish I could be there to witness this event. This type of togetherness is what makes the USA a very unique and special place to call home despite the tragic loss. God speed.

R Navarro Yorba Linda Ca (Sent Wednesday, April 16, 2008 9:17 PM)

So very true. I could not have predicted how deep the connection, or how personal those events would affect me eight years after graduation. I had no idea four months later that I would try to watch the first football game of the season while trying to hide tears from my wife and kids. I saw the photo of the murdered cadet, while hanging pictures just beyond the TV mirrored that image but with my face inside the uniform. And you are exactly right with what defines us. The rise of the Hokie Nation to honor the victims as our own and support their families. My heart and soul belong to that school and Hokies everywhere....a dedication that will always define who I am.

Chris, Panama City, FL (Sent Wednesday, April 16, 2008 9:26 PM)

Thank you Hoda for expressing so well what Virginia Tech means to us. Student, Alumi, retiree, we can never be anything but a Hokie, and, we are prevailing, we are Virginia Tech!

Mary A. Sutphin (Sent Wednesday, April 16, 2008 11:00 PM)

Hoda you will do fantastic, I'm sure.

I have avoided the pictures, commentary up unitl tonight, after all that's to be said has been said and it's now the day after. I am a staff clinical pharmacist at one of the hospitals that cared for those who could be cared for. I have the luxury of working during the night after much of the carnage had gone on then and today after all the memorials. In the silence of the night, there can be a certain peace..and I knew that night just as this night that our family(Hokies) would make this something...I think that story is still being written...in tears and in efforts..but I rest assured that "It" will be something important.

I am PROUD to be a Hokie, I am proud of my collegues who rose to a unthinkable occasion and I am proud of the students who chose to return and to come..to a place that Im certain will be as important...as sacred and as special as Virginia Tech.

Good Luck and God be with You.

David Harlow, Christiansburg VA (Sent Thursday, April 17, 2008 1:04 AM)

As the parent of a current student at VTech, and a fan of yours long
before I knew you were a VTech grad, I am sure you are very much
up to this. You're terrific!

Dottie McMillan (Sent Thursday, April 17, 2008 7:38 AM)

Dear Hoda, My daughter, who attends college at a different university, lost a dear friend from childhood in the shootings at Virginia Tech. It still hurts her deeply, as it does my husband and me, in the sheer senselessness of the waste of such young and beautiful life. You are correct - the people of Virginia Tech are and will be defined by how they live on. And they are doing this with great love of and respect for life. My best to you in your grief, Bonnie Hiatt

Bonnie Hiatt (Sent Thursday, April 17, 2008 8:32 AM)

You have been grieving, too. If you're connected to a place and its people, you can physically feel their pain. Your speech will be wonderful. When this first happened, I had an idea for helping to prevent future violence: Colleges/universities give the local, state, county, etc. police part-time free tuition....it would help the officers advance themselves, intellectually, and their presence would be obvious and hopefully, a deterrent. In the event of a problem, chances are there'd be some law enforcement people right there.
I just think it would be a positive solution and the benefits would roll forward, so to speak!
Best of luck with your speech; it will be a healing experience, I imagine, for you and the entire student body. You are something positive!

Pinky O'Hara, St. Augusine, Fl 32085 (Sent Thursday, April 17, 2008 11:08 AM)

As the parent of a current student at VTech, and a fan of yours long
before I knew you were a VTech grad, I am sure you are very much
up to this. You're terrific!

Dottie McMillan (Sent Thursday, April 17, 2008 11:31 AM)

I went to Virginia Tech yesterday to honor the students and faculty killed a year ago. It just seemed like the right place for be. The campus is still filled with a great deal of sadness, and I'm not sure it will ever be the same. The school is not defined by the tragedy that took place, but the sense of utter loss still hangs over the entire campus. I thought that after a year of mourning, I would feel differently than I did in the days after the shootings, but I don't. I'm still as sad, angry and confused as I was last April. I'm just not sure those feelings with ever pass. And maybe they shouldn't. Virginia Tech did an extraordinary job during the events yesterday, and throughout the entire year, by making the best in the school's character shine through even after such a horrific event. I wish all fellow Hokies the best. Go Hokies!

Jennifer, Richmond, Virginia (Sent Thursday, April 17, 2008 1:15 PM)

Thank you Hoda! I was a student last year (May 2007 grad) and I wish there were more people able to bring attention to this "look". We are many things at VT, but pitiful isn't one of them. We all accept your condolences, but we do not accept your pity. So if you meet a student/graduate of VT don't give "the look" give a high five, give a "wow what a great school", give a smile, but don't give your pity.

GO HOKIES!! Spring game this weekend! See you all there!

Laura, Alexandria, VA (Sent Thursday, April 17, 2008 2:46 PM)

Yes, Hoda, VT does deserve so much, and, yes, you are worthy of giving their commencement speech. In light of what VT has endured on their campus this past year, and in light of what you, a VT alumni, have endured in your battle against breast cancer this past year...there could be no one else more capable and deserving for the job. You said it yourself, "people are defined by what they do after a tragedy" and "out of the worst of tragedies, people will rise up". No one exemplifies those statements more than your alma mater and yourself. VT has remained strong and moved on while continuing to honor those lives that were lost. And you have remained strong and moved FORWARD! And because you didn't "HOG YOUR JOURNEY" you are being placed in the position to encourage others to not hog theirs, and that is a wonderful gift to the world that so many of us wish we could give. Go get 'em!!!!
Sincerely,
Lee
*Please consider sharing your speech with us all.*

Lee Raybon, Mobile, Alabama (Sent Friday, April 18, 2008 4:17 AM)

I know how you feel. I graduated at VPI&SU in '82 and I dreaded the thought of reliving the media blitz of the tragedy. At the time it happened it left me with PTSD like 9/11 which, to this day, makes me feel weepy when I see tall buildings collapse on TV. It's not the buildings, but the lives lost they represent.

Al Sea, Richmond, VA (Sent Friday, April 18, 2008 11:52 AM)

Hmm... You must be missing your school very much... Dear Hoda Kotb,
I am also really very sorry for the children who died in the accident and I pray from my heart for them... I am Aurundutee Ameen from Bangladesh and sending my condolence for the family and friends through this message... Thank for sharing the story with us...

AurunduteeAmeen, Dhaka, Bangladesh (Sent Sunday, April 20, 2008 8:21 AM)

My family bought hats and shirts from VTech area retailers to wear, and we were just stationed near there in VA. who in the world knows now what was going on in that idiots mind but that one is probably in hell as lying in wait to kill is the only unforgiving sin that i am aware of. Also, those strange people from the places they house children and abuse them all the time,we know it. If you think those ladies think what they say is true you are right.. because they are BRAIN WASHED, they have no idea how to speak like a true woman. therefore in my opinion they have no deep deep concept of what a real woman is, just having kids does not make you such. It is teaching wrong from right and the living word which for us smart ones is reading the Bible and understanding it. what in the hell are these TOOLS thinking. that is what they are TOOLS for the MEN. YUCK iCK and all that stuff. shame on those men or shall we say MOLESTERS, taking advantage of the innocence of LIFE. GOD WOULD NOT OR DOES NOT LIKE THAT at all my friends.
Ct~

Cari ,Florida (Sent Monday, April 21, 2008 8:57 AM)

Dear Hoda,
So few words could not have meant more than, "they deserve so much"...and they, the VT campus, do deserve so much. They have lost, mourned, survived and remembered, and so have you. As a VT alumni and a survivor of breast cancer you have done the same and so, there is no one more fitting to give the commencement speech this year. You represent all that your beloved alma mater has endured and you will be able to connect with them in a way that no one else can. More than anything you can show them how to move FORWARD...what a great word! And remind them as they enter this crazy, beautiful world...DON'T HOG YOUR JOURNEY! Because you chose not to hog yours, you can inspire them to not hog theirs and the world can be forever changed for the better.
So, in short, you are worthy of this honor. Go get 'em!
Sincerely,
Lee Raybon

Lee Raybon, Mobile, Alabama (Sent Monday, April 21, 2008 3:13 PM)

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