Boy, it is incredible to see and hear all the hypocrisy as it relates to relationships in particular and life in general. Paul Janka is being truthful about what he wants from a relationship; good sex and a good time. I'm well aware of the psychological and health risks of  multiple sex partners but adults have to be responsible for their health and their choices. More than anything, I think Paul destroys the fantasy and mythology that many women are taught concerning sexuality and dating; some men are content to date and do not want a wife and children, although I believe a good many do. My view is that most people are very uncomfortable with people who are honest and truthful about their feelings and intentions; most people are operating under the standard societal mode of "political correctness-itis", which is manipulative and dishonest from the start. There are MANY undercover Paul Janka's in the world; can YOU handle the truth?

Well said! Michele Varady, Pleasant Ridge, Michigan  You nailed that one to the core.

Women seem to be upset at this man, but the women who are interested in him should assume some responsibility for their choices. He doesn't appear to be a lire and he's not that clever.  Many woman would rather buy into the fantasy of trying to fix this guy because he is exciting, dangerous and a challenge, rather than find a good man.

I feel sorry for this guy because he doesn't get that he has bought into a pop-culture media driven idea of dating. He doesn't know how to exist in a real relationship. To top it off he was stupid enough to write about and go on TV.

I feel sorry for the women who date him for the same reasons.

Stop man hating. It takes two dysfunctional people to make a fruitless relationship.  

I watched tne entire interview, twice.

1:  Never does Paul say he wants to hurt anybody, despite being repeatedly baited by Meredith.  I was surprised at her, I thought she had more class and journalistic integrity than to go there.  She set intelligent reporting back a few years; pitiful.

2:  Never does Paul say that he's only interested in bedding the women, he clearly says he wants dating variety and that if he was to meet somebody who meets his personal criteria he's very open to a longer term and meaningful, spiritual and even familial relationship.  That his life goal is marriage and family.

3:  Where does it say a person is supposed to only date and bed one woman?  (religions keep your rules to yourselves here) Isn't the object of dating to gain a more clear understanding of what you like and what you DONT like in order to move to the next phase of emotional development in a relationship?  If its not really fun or if the sex isn't hot, why open up for more hurt?  Why invest more time and money?

4:  Why do so many people herein assume that Paul's dates are going to be crushed and destroyed?  After one or two dates and a romp in the hay?  Why is there no discussion of the leagues and hoardes of men who have been dated for a meal, the theater tickets, the weekend ski trip, as eye/arm candy for a party or their sister's wedding and then dumped by the following Tuesday?  I think women are far more calloused in terms of being "selective" about dating and have nearly zero feelings of remorse for the poor slobs who think they've fallen in love or found "her" only to realize when she doesn't return his calls that he was only the penis of the week.  I've heard it over and over and over from so many unmarried men  that they have a hard time telling the difference between the liars and the genuine ones because women are conditioned and trained to lie in order to get what they want.  WOMEN invented fake hair color, fake eyelashes, makeup, padded undergarments, fake breasts, fake orgasms and LOTS of women fake love in order to have jewels, trips, cars, even offspring.  I know a few men who later realized they were little more than a meal-ticket and sperm donor; they were targeted for their looks, their brains, their earning power and their legacy/inheiritance/power.

5:  Both Paul and the Doctor were well spoken but dancing clearly through the insinuations and such of Meredith.  To engender Paul as a casanova was inappropriate on behalf of the Doctor.  Meredith seemed to almost trip on her enthusiasm to deride and insult Paul.  Meanwhile, did anybody miss that this was obviously Paul's initial book hook media foray.  He is sophisticated enough to realize this interview will stir some controversy.  If you paid close attention, Paul alludes to what he "wrote" and refers to the interveiw as "the piece" because he's savvy about where this might take him.  He's a writer promoting a book deal.

Ladies. this really isn't about you at all.  All this is about is yet another pop "how to" manual for guys to try and figure out how to get what they THINK they want and/or THINK they need or THINK they deserve our of their "love life."  Every person certainly has the right to try and enjoy their life and relationships.  The "off the deep end" narcissistic personality disorder zealots and wounded souls who are trying to spin this up into some vicious rape story are only mongering fear and hatred.  This is about having fun, not hurting women. Paul, lose the scruffy beard, it only scrapes the inside of the thighs.

I believe this man suffers from Sexual addiction/Intimacy disorder.  I wished there would have been a Doctor on that would have talked more about that issue. This is not normal behavior and it really bothered me that it is being made out to be innocent fun and casual sex.  Sex addiction is becoming a problem world wide.  It has nothing to do with women he is not honest with them.  They look for vulnerable women and take advantage of them.  They don’t do it because it’s fun to have sex. It’s like a crack head that needs crack. They need the dopamine there body produces each time they have sex.  It’s a very sad and dark life to live, that ends in tragedy most of the time.

I live next door to an older version of Paul.  We have been neighbors for years and I have listend to all his tales of the women he has dated.  His take on this is "Men are meant to sow their seed in as many partners as possible".  He is very charming, intelligent and well spoken just as Paul and yes he has turned that charm on me and it is very hard to resist when anyone (not just good looking) tells you how attractive you are and treats you like there is no one in the world quite like you - but as someone earlier said about NPR it is always for their benefit and there is little thought of the havoc they can create in the emotional feelings of the women they date and ultimately leave wondering what happened.  The downside of this for women would be that after several brushes with this type of man - trust for a more emotionally stable man would be hard to give freely as well as one's perception of their personal worth diminished.

Paul Janka as I see him: puerile and misguided - he doesn't seem to have ever experienced true intimacy with a woman.  He may have deeper needs, perhaps he is a latent homosexual.  Whatever the case, why do we care what this guy thinks?  I don't find anything here ground breaking, must be a slow news week

Paul - you are a great looking guy, smart, successful..but I have to ask, is there anything below the surface?

It's true that you are meeting all these women.  You are getting physical satisfaction and company, but when its all said and done, you're ALONE.  In the grand scheme of things, you stuck at the same point and will repeat the same cycle over and over again.  Variety is great in life, but at some point to have to move on. That's how you grow as a person.

At this point you could make the argument that I could settle down with a woman, but be careful, my friend, of a little thing called Karma.  What comes around, goes around.

Redeem Yourself...you are intelligent enough to know how....care about how you indirectly hurt someone

good luck

The fact that a person would waste so much of their time on empty relationships is very sad. Living life on the surface is easy but unrewarding. Anyone can become a Casanova and anyone with low enough esteem can be seduced by their charm. Creating something real, worthwhile and fulfilling takes patience and trust and a willingness to put someone's needs ahead of your own. So this guy perfers to live on the surface and not establish any real connection with a woman. To each their own. I don't think that he has grown the maturity needed to create and maintain a serious relationship. I just hope that someday he wakes up and realizes that there is so much more to life.

He sounds like an Ass, but for a male that is not unusual. However, he also seems to be honest. I choose honesty anyday.

Women go for him because of the challenge that he presents.  Sure he is being up front saying that he doesn't want to be pinned down but that flips a little swich in most women who think "I could make him settle down." Something about tamming the beast makes women go for this and eventually he will be bored with most women as soon as he has gotten what he wants.  Eventually he will settle down or be the creepy old man hitting on younger women in a bar somewhere. Although Casanova was a scoundrel and we loved him for it so I can't blame this guy for trying it too.

This would've been a much better segment if a female equivalent was on the show as well. It depicted men as once again, the sleezy gender. Sex addicts come in all types, which I agree he is one. But in his case, making women the victim only takes away from the equal and intellegent beings they are. I'm sure he has issues as maybe do the women who sleep with him, but lets not demonize them all. If this segment came out in the 70's we would all be laughing at it's puritanical view. Today we pathologize it. I understand that but it puts too many people into the victim mode of thinking.

Everyone has the right to want what they want and to try to get it. This guy is no different and I don't understand why his wants are on the Today show for judgement. We could all learn a lesson here. Figure out what we want and go for it without reservation, without apology.

This has definately driven me to comment on how visibly empty this man is.. and every man that thinks he  is a "casanova"...get a life. I predict he has an unhappy and tormented soul...and he was not raised with self esteem and inner confidence.  I pray that he realizes he needs more than split second satisfacton from women...and the life he is leading is only hurting himself. He needs to grow up and be a man.If you are only used to the pornograghic images on your computer..and need that constant"variety"...you can bank on a life of shame. If I were his mother I would be embarrassed.
P.S. Shave and get a haircut!..and say your prayers

Someone is speaking up for a lot of "weak" women. I doubt Paul ever forced or felt he needed to "trick" a woman into bed. A poll should have been conducted on the women being discussed and determined how many felt "used." I also hope he loves Jesus, uses protection, and calls his mother.

First, in the interest of full disclosure, I am 53 years old, happily married and not in the dating arena.  In my younger years, I was blessed with what many people considered to be "model's"  beauty and figure.  More than once I was the recipient of a line of baloney about spending lots of time together, perhaps a future, etc, just to get me where they wanted me to be.  I would much rather have had an honest, real man like Paul.  Nothing wrong with a little casual fun for both sexes.  

I'm sorry that some of the ladies Paul has dated got hung up, but, quite frankly, that's their problem.  He did not mislead them; they misled themselves.  Many people don't really listen to what's being said to them -- they only hear what they want to hear.  These women need to get real!  He never promised you tomorrow -- lighten up and enjoy.  Men like Paul can turn out to be the ones that give you some of your most memorable experiences.

I am a 36 year old woman from N.Y.  I have had the pleasure of leading the same lifestyle as Paul is leading.  I have met multitudes of men and couple, many have been the greatest people I have ever met in my entire life.  Of course if "I" being a woman went on tv to tell my story the response would have been a little different (slut).  I was very suprised that the topic of safe sex was not addressed.  I commend Paul for being upfront and honest with the woman that he is with. If you are honest and upfront and someone gets hurt.... there is only one person to blame.   Way to go Paul... keep up the good work!

Paul was very honest in what he said. From what he said, he doesn't mislead any of the women he deals with. He tells them upfront what he's looking for, so any woman who develops feelings for him does so at her own risk. And he's right, he's not responsible for anyone's feelings as long as he is hoest from the very beginning.

My guess is the women who get hurt are the ones who think they can change him or any man, and when that change doesn't happen, their feeling get hurt and they blame him when it was their own fault.

I thought Paul was very articulate, well spoken, non confrontational, intelligent and honest. Paul is overcharged and oversexed.  So many comments on here discuss his good looks, when in reality there are plenty of good looking men who could not live his lifestyle even if they choose. I too feel sorry for Paul in his shallow existance, unable to give love and recieve love. I feel that anyone who feels the need to discuss the number of women he has had is trying too hard and may have orintation issues. Unbelievable!  Are there no people out there who have morals and values anymore?  Casanova or scoundrel...really doesn't matter, whether the general public agrees or disagrees, thats no excuse to badger a person the way Mr. Janka just was. Please know that all women, single or otherwise, are not "putty" in men's hands.

What amazes me is that there seems to be a "dis-order" label for every bit of behavior out there.  I think the interviewers were extremely unprofessional, and it was unfair of them to try and convince him that he need "help" in order to "cure" himself.  I commend Paul for his honesty with himself and with the women he comes into contact with.  I would argue that he lives a much healthier lifestyle than most married couples in this country.

The BIG question here is as follows;
Are people responsible for their own feelings when dating?

More questions
Do women have more false ideas on dates?
What are the women thinking when they are going up to his apartment?
When are women going to get it, that having sex before marriage is not going to guarantee them a spouse?
When are women going to stop this facade that they didn't only want sex?

I agree with the all the men and women above that Paul was honest and straight forward. The interviewers goofed big time.

I found him to be a very articulate man. However, I found his argument to be very juvinile saying men like variety b.c that is what society has installed on us, look at playboy ect., and that is his excuse. I've dated a man like that, and broke up with him. He said all the right things he's in pharmacy school right now actually. In the end however, after all casanova talk, I found him boring and dense after a couple weeks. When you ask a guy like that why? their best answer is based on his looks, and society. In the end though it seems to me like middle school kids in puberty who just think about sex. They havn't grown up to see what a relationship is and responsiblity. Pathetic actually.

Paul knows exactly what he is doing.  He takes risks, comes on strong, probably says all the things a girl likes to hear and gives her a lot of attention (which we all love), he "just has fun", then when he realizes that she doesn't fullfill his "fantacy perfect woman image", he moves on to the next victim.  Woman: don't jump on a fast-moving train, you'll just get thrown off!

Give me a break! No matter where this guy graduated from, he has learned the art of how to manipulate women with words. He speaks of himself in the third person, he's a self-proclaimed "casanova" and he's using women as subjects for a documentary that he hopes will be made into a movie one day and guess what - he's been given the best of publicity on the TODAY SHOW! How about next time you choose another bum from the streets of New York, clean him up, put him on the show and see how many other women can be manipulated with just looks and scripted words.

If people can get off there soapbox and quit being so damned insecure they would realize what this man is doing is completely honest and I find "actually" a little integrous. When people say he is using females to get what he wants, "I" think he is giving the opposite sex a chance to do just that- to get they want and be a little selfish themselves. Insecure people(which I believe for arguments sake are a lot of us) misread and judge because they don't have the confidence to deal with this type of activity. I believe it is 100% ok to be honest for your own selfish gain, and as long as you are being forthright in your actions and words, there is no foul play.If you can't see that for absolute fact and opportunity, don't screw around (women and men alike). I also believe this type of behavior and activity is disconnected from emotions and is totally separated from physical, in both attraction and needs. I have been on both sides of the fence and I actually still have female friends that were once "flings". Being able to do that;I think that's the best part. And yes, I now have a girlfriend and I am completely happy (and forthright) with her at every level, to include knowing what I have been and how I think and believe. There is ABSOLUTELY nothing wrong with what this gentleman does. And although I love Meredith, she capitalized on a VERY small percentage of what I feel are truly just "insecure" women who need to own up to there own fantasies gone wrong.

NOTE! Ever heard of a razor? A comb? Get a life dude...

Paul is an incredibly evocative character introducing salient issues to the public discourse.  I can't wait to write to my congressman and/or congresswoman about Paul...and see what they think.

I'm really disappointed in the responses I read from people who seem to not care about the damage this man and women who are out there using people at any cost.I really look at them as being predators waiting on the next victim willing or unwilling it is wrong.So no matter how beautiful and intelligent you are as the old cliche goes what goes around comes around.

Seriously, I've had better looking garbage men. Why are so many people assumming his education and looks make his behaviour acceptable just because he's upfront about it. Sounds like a narcissistic jerk to me. I wonder if his attorney has ever heard the words "date rape"?

Paul knows exactly what he is doing. No matter where this guy graduated from, he has learned the art of how to manipulate women with words. If people can get off there soapbox and quit being so damned insecure they would realize what this man is doing is completely honest and I find "actually" a little integrous. Ever heard of a razor? A comb? Get a life dude...

Why are people so upset?
In today's world, as always, there are Males and Females both after the same thing, casual sex.
Women look and men hunt, sometimes they find each and sometimes one or the other gets hurt, but they move on.
Sex is fun, looking after your health should be paramount and if something ontoward should occur such it up and bear the consequences.

Paul obviously has a problem with his self image and sees his value interms of the conquest of women.

Narcissitic Personality Disordered people are those who lack an ability to feel empathy for others. I think this young man is a prime example.

Out of the mouth of....'IT'
"I understand that women have a biologically-driven need to feel connected with a man before sex, but the reality is men have myriad schemes, personas and other illusions to shield their true selves from a woman whom they want to screw."

I think this just reinforces the generally accepted view that (most) men and (most) women approach sex in very different ways.  In my (female) experience, casual sex just isn't nearly as pleasurable or satisfying as sex in a loving relationship. But I believe that there are many men who find pleasure and satisfaction in casual or even anonymous sex.  So where does that leave us?  We're biologically different.   Society and biology are not perfectly attuned. How do we make them work together, or can we?

Fortunately, I avoided tools like this and found real love with a truly genuine man who loves me back. Love is not a business deal. This guy makes me sick. Intimacy issues??? This probably works well because most women are dumb enough to think they can change a man. My experience is usually that you get a little less than what you see in the beginning. Once you are intimate, you lose objectivity and the "frog" who just wants to jump you seems like a "prince" in disguise. RUN FROM THIS IDIOT. BLAST HIS SMUG MUG ALL OVER THE TV SO ONE DATES THIS DOG.

This is just my opinion ,  but I don't think he really likes women. If he did he would'nt treat them like that.  I think deep down inside he really hates them--because of some deep rooted problem he has.  I think he should seek therapy.  I also think it is because (he is a slut) that he feels he can treat other people like sluts also.  And I don't think he is Gay, because Gay men for the most part, are very sensitive and caring about people's feelings; and usually have more respect for women than most heterosexual men do.

As a woman with an androgynous mind, I can say that someone like Paul that is upfront, honest, and confidently pursues his desires is definitely a turn on!
He's not ignorant as to think he will never fall for a woman, just honest that his current intentions are sex. I don't see anything wrong with that. If more people could be this honest with their true desires, there would be a lot less heart break in the world.
GO GET 'EM TIGER!

I think that a woman who knows herself and knows what she wants has an obligation to herself to hold to her own values.  Like anthing else we do in our life to be successful, set goals and stick to them.  Physical intimacy cannot replace emmotional intimacy.  Paul appears to be aware of this and as such, chooses physical intimacy over emmotional.  Who is to say that there is some thing wrong with this?  Just because some one has a a PhD, does not make that person qualified to determine what is most conducive to one person's needs.  Paul, which he admits, will find (hopefully) a relationship that challenges him, nurtures him, and pushes him to grow as an individual and he will leave his playboy lifestyle behind.  Until that time, he is learning what he likes and does not like in the women he meets and as such, will be able to make a better informed decision of who he wants to be with in the future.  My father was known as a cassanova in his time and when he met my mother, his life changed.  I have never known a man to be more attentive, dedicated, or loyal to a woman.  So much so, I have VERY high expectations of any man who wants to be part of my life.  When I asked him what makes his relationship work for him he answered that my mom is dynamic.  She changes and grows as a person and there is still a novelty about her that he continues to be facinated by.  His best advice to me, know myself and who I am and always pursue that first.

I think he was just hitting on Meredith.

I think it's obvious why women are attracted to our Casanova - it is because he is dead sexy, magnetizing. You could tell what he was all about just by the way he looked at the camera. It's all about the sex, honey. Let me be clear, however, I would choose not to engage with this person. He is wrong for anyone looking for any type of genuine relationship. He was completely unapologetic and honest about his dating behaviors. Anyone who takes offense needs to realize that being with a man like this is a choice. He's not prince charming, and if that's not apparent from the get go you have a lot to learn.

honestly, i'm just glad i don't play that game anymore.

The kind of women that are attracted to a "dog" such as this are the ones whom are not sure of themselves and are always looking for "Mr. Right" in all the wrong places. Yes, I agree with others whom have called Paul as arrogant. I'm sure he won't be getting as much dates after the women sees his face on TV and what he bragged about!

I wonder what his mother thinks.....

Placing my morals beside,

These responses are unbelivable to me.  You are really trying to inform me that he is not hurting anyone?  How can you narrow minded peeople actually believe this?  If nothing else this man assuredly has HPV and has passed it in one of its strains on to a victim somewhere out there.  Condoms do not stop this disease.  HPV is the leading cause of ovarian cancer in women.  Would you want him with your sister or daughter?

He's a boor! For a Harvard educated man he has no bearing.  To brag about your sexual conquests is disgusting. He sat on that show with his legs spread wide open.  On his preview video he looked like he needed a shower and a shave. Hopefully, for the woman's sake they practice safe sex.  He's not even good looking. He sounds like he has a sexual addition. I wouldn"t take a second look at him  He's the type who would cheat on his wife.  JERK

As long as he is up front with women about his intentions (and practices safe sex), what is wrong with wanting to have a good time with another consenting adult?

I'm sure that any woman who has gotten hurt by his actions had convinced herself that she was going to be the one to 'change his ways' - women are capable of only hearing what they want to hear when it comes to love.

I agree that Love is a Long sweet dream and marriage is the alarm clock ! However after dating alot of women as a MBA Millionare , I want to keep my net worth intact and not lose it in a rushed marriage.I only take my clothes off for one woman at a time.

I see this type of behavior all the time from men and women, married and single.  I think Paul made an excellent point when he highlighted the fact that men who are married and claim to be happily married utilize Playboy, porn, strip clubs, etc.  All of these listed things and then some are feeding men what they desire secretly or sometimes not so secretly.  As he said in the interview, which was not picked up by Meridith, men desire variety, which they get whether married or not, which is also true with women.  If you took a poll in just your studio, you would find that men contribute to these type of items, married or not.  I did not think that Meridith conducted herself as a good reporter, which was very distracting.  It seemed as if she was attacking this man just because he was being honest.  I agreed with the Dr. that this man was very good at what he did and I also agreed with her that one cannot assume that no one is going to get hurt.  Paul may reconsider the fact that these women actually fall for men like him even though they know the only purpose they are there is to fulfill the now desire.  Also, people who engage in casual sex make themselves vulnerable and should re-evaluate the word "casual."

Ha, ha, ha, what is this guy doing on t.v.?!  I laughed out loud when I saw that he lives in NYC; it figures, since there are way too many guys here who fancy themselves "Casanovas"!  It's amazing how even the biggest geek thinks he deserves a super model with a PhD for a wife in this town.  Whatever his motives, I seriously doubt he is oh so "honest" prior to or in the heat of the moment, more like after she's left her earrings behind and over the phone.  He seemed sophmoric and boring to me, and the ladies he is able to fool are probably just as lame.  Morality aside, he is developing a bad habit that will be hard to break should he ever attempt to settle down.  Will Meredith be checking back with him when he's bald with a beer gut?

honestly, he was pretty cheesy.  articulate, educated, and good-looking - that's why women fall for him.  plus, he had a certain energy that might attract some women but thank god meredith did not fall for that! hahhaha.  

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