DEAR ADA
Posted: Tuesday, March 20, 2007 1:46 PM by Katharine Billman
Dear Ada,
I am 30 and single. I've done Match.com, and have been on blind dates to no avail. I think I'm actually turned off by the thought of having to try to meet someone. I know it's unrealistic to think that fate alone could bring me my dream guy, but why can't I get excited about the more unconventional ways to meet people. Another thing, I find that I am not getting excited by the dates I've had recently. Is it me or is it the dates? I can't tell! Perhaps I'm just going through an apathetic stage?
-Heather, Minneapolis
I enlisted relationship expert, sexologist and frequent Today guest Logan Levkoff to help answer your question. Here are her words of advice:
Dear Heather,
Dating success is more than just leaving it up to fate – it has a lot to do with our attitude and our self-esteem. In order for us to be better “daters” we need to recognize that our happiness cannot be based upon whether or not we are partnered. We need to feel good about who we are on our own; we cannot expect someone else to make us feel better about ourselves.
Even if you’ve already tackled the self-esteem component of dating, it’s still okay to feel overwhelmed, bored, or completely turned off by dating – especially if you haven’t met anyone interesting. People put a lot of pressure on meeting “the perfect mate,” but what may be perfect for one is certainly not perfect for another. Actually, there are times when what we may perceive as perfect may not be good for us, either. Sometimes we need to expand our minds in terms of who are looking for.
Often (and especially on the dating sites), people stick to looking at one type of profile and pass over people who may not be (on paper) what we were originally looking for. Sometimes we need to take a chance and date outside of our “type.” If anything, the diversity will get you out of that dating boredom. (Read more about online dating and watch our recent segment on Today HERE).
That being said, it’s okay to take a break from dating (even if your friends or your mother say otherwise). If you are not excited by your dates – or even the prospect of having one – that’s okay, it happens. Besides, if you are losing interest, your dates will probably sense your apathy, too. And if that’s the case, it is likely that he won’t be on his A-game either.
When you are ready to go back to dating, you may have a better sense of who you are and what it takes for you to be fulfilled, emotionally and physically. And no one ever said that you need to go back to the same old dating routine. Try something new; it couldn't possibly hurt.
(Check out Logan's website www.loganlevkoff.com for more information and relationship help. You can read her recent column on iVillage HERE).
Dear Ada,
I was wondering how the Today Show handles occasions when one of the anchors wakes up sick in the morning, or has another problem that would prevent him/her from showing up for work that day--in other words, an absence that is not planned. With other jobs, you can just call in sick, but with live shows I assume this situation can be difficult.
Karen, Kelseyville, CA
Dear Karen,
As anyone in the news business will attest to, you're always on call! Should Matt Lauer call in sick, we call Lester Holt or David Gregory. Have you noticed Chris Cimino doing the weather when Al is out? If Meredith is feeling under par, Ann covers and Natalie Morales moves to the News desk. In other words, everyone knows to be on call day or night, whether to travel across the globe to cover a newsbreaking story, or to fill in for an anchor that's too sick to make it in. Last minute sick call? No problem. We may change the show around a bit, and count on the best professionals in the business to get us through.
Dear Ada,
I am writing to find out about body language expert who was on Monday, March 12th. I would like to know if it is possible to obtain transcripts or a link to his website if at all possible.
William Hopson, Washington, DC
Dear William,
Many of our viewers want more information on our body language segment. Our guest was former FBI agent Joe Navarro, who can tell the kind of person you are just by the way you're crossing your legs! You can read a behind the scenes interview by Elizabeth Neumann on her blog.
Dear Ada,
My Mother will be 100 years this year! How do I get her mentioned on the Today Show?
Marty White, Camdentown, MO
Dear Marty,
Happy Birthday Mom!! Send your photo (digital is fine, but hard copy is better) to Lessandra Machamer, NBC Today, 4001 Nebraska Ave NW, Room 160, Washington, DC 20016. Please include name, picture, birthdate, birthplace, and a short personal note. Also include a contact name and phone number. Should we choose your submission, we'd like to call you and let you know.
Dear Ada,
I am becoming slightly obsessed with trying to figure out Ann Curry's little gold necklace! What is the little gold charm on it? Whatever..... it's lovely.
Debby Cornwell
Dear Debby,
Obsess no more! The necklace was given to Ann as a birthday gift from two of our producers. The symbol is the yoga Aum (or as Westerners like to call it - Om).
Send your questions to Dear Ada.
